Dear Reader,
What people often call “narcissistic traits” are, in reality, layers of protection. Over time, people build these defenses often unconsciously to protect something wounded deep inside. When we slap the label “narcissist” on someone, it doesn’t heal them or us. It creates distance and blocks compassion. Beneath all that, there isn’t a label, there’s a soul. And when we stop labeling, that’s when we truly see them.
With understanding,
Richie
Most people don’t lack answers they lack access. God isn’t hiding truth; we’re just standing in the wrong place to receive it. Spiritual understanding only comes when we stop analyzing from the outside and step into who we really are in the story.
We all ask the hard questions at some point, like
“If God is love, how could the majority of humanity end up in hell?”
It’s not that God hasn’t answered that question.
We’ve placed ourselves where we lack access to parts of His mind. These parts would help us understand it.
The deeper truth is this. We’re only granted access to the understandings relevant to who we actually are in the story.
If we’re living from a place of pride, rebellion, avoidance, or self-preservation, we only perceive truths that match those positions. Other truths remain hidden from us.
And God honors that.
Spiritual access is granted to those who are willing to be honest about who they are. This honesty is needed not just in behavior, but also in identity. You become a vessel of truth when you stop trying to analyze the story from the outside. Let God show you where you actually stand inside it.
You’re not shut out of understanding.
But you’re only going to understand the parts that relate to where you really are. And for some people, that’s a scary thing to face because the answers won’t flatter them. The truth of God doesn’t bend to protect our feelings or justify our doubt.
But it does tell you exactly where you stand.
You want to understand the big questions?
Become a member in truth. Not in name, not in appearance but in actual spiritual position.
Only then does the understanding start to come.
A personal reflection on unexplained anxiety, emotional triggers, and the spiritual insight that helped me stop falling back into addiction. This message may offer clarity if you’ve ever carried something that wasn’t yours and didn’t know it.
A message I shared with someone who kept falling back into addiction when anxiety hit
Someone shared something with me that I understand very well.
They said, “I get this feeling of anxiety out of nowhere. When it shows up, I end up falling again. I don’t want to, but I can’t seem to stop it once it starts.”
What I Learned Through Experience
There was a period in my life when I felt off more often than not. There wasn’t always a reason. I kept walking with God the best I could, but the pressure kept returning.
I constantly asked Him for help, but the answers didn’t seem to come.
And then, one day, in a moment of exhaustion and frustration, I asked
“Why is this happening?”
“Who are You?”
That last question changed everything.
It was after that when a period of unexpected freedom began. During this time, I started to see what was really happening.
And what I realized was:
Some of the anxiety I had been carrying wasn’t mine.
I had been misreading things, thinking every emotional disruption was my problem. I thought I was failing because I couldn’t seem to get free from it.
But the truth is that some of what I felt came from what was around me. It did not come from what was inside me.
That realization changed how I approached everything. Because I no longer treated every disruption like proof I was broken. I started recognizing that I was sensing things without understanding what I was sensing. And because I didn’t understand, I took responsibility for it like it was my own.
And that confusion was part of what pulled me off track.
What Helped Me Begin to See
I studied the lives and decisions of people in Scripture. I watched how they moved. I observed how they responded to God and pressure. It wasn’t from a sermon or a devotional. It was through personal study. By walking things out in my own life, I began to recognize a pattern.
There are moments in Scripture where people are affected by what’s happening around them, either emotionally or spiritually.
Why This Matters When Addiction Is Involved
Unexplained emotions can hit someone unexpectedly. This is especially true if addiction has been part of their life. These emotions can become the perfect setup for a fall. You’ll feel off. When nothing makes sense and there’s no apparent cause, it becomes too easy to drown it out or self-medicate.
And that’s when the old pattern shows up. The one you thought was done with. The one you buried.
But it didn’t start because you rebelled.
It started because you were overwhelmed and didn’t have the language for it.
That’s what I told the person I was speaking to.
Because it helped me.
It helped me realize that I wasn’t just someone who kept messing up.
One of the most important shifts for me was learning to wait when something was bothering me. I learned to ask God what it was before I acted.
Sometimes, it was something in me or something I had picked up from the people or the environment around me.
I learned that as we progress and move beyond each issue, we can still experience triggers. When we do, it may be normal to internally ask, “What’s this for?” and “Why is this coming on?” because it’s not having its prior effect. Without anyone to explain it to me, I began to wonder if some of it was real. Was salvation real because I’m different, I changed? Was I being toyed with?
A scripture spontaneously came to mind, saying God knows who leaves a meat offering behind, and I understood the connection. The feeling wasn’t mine; I sensed that it was for the sake of others still stuck in the same places. It was so that I could share how the lord can bring them through. That all came to me after I had begun to share with people in places where I hadn’t received help. I wanted to fill that gap as much as possible so they wouldn’t have to endure the same wait.
Jesus mentioned in a parable that he wants us to multiply what he’s given us.
If you find yourself in the same position and experiencing the same issue, this might be a key for you. Especially if you had similar ideas as I did. You might think, well I’ll share after these other issues are taken care of. You might wonder, “how valuable can what I have to share be?”. These other issues are still in my life.
You don’t have to wait until you reach your idea of complete is reached to help another.
Learn how emotional overwhelm can distort truth in Christian relationships, and how biblical wisdom brings healing and clarity in conflict.
How Emotion Can Distort Love, Rewrite the Past, and What to Do About It
By Heaven In A Moment Ministries
There are moments in close relationships, especially the ones rooted in deep commitment, when a conversation suddenly turns into something else entirely. One person is trying to connect, but the other is overwhelmed. The pain of old moments starts boiling, and all of it comes pouring out, spilling into the present like it was never processed at all.
But instead of healing, the flood begins to change the shape of everything. The past. The truth. Even the identity of the other person.
This is for the ones who’ve been caught in that storm and the ones who’ve unknowingly caused it. You’re not alone. And you’re not crazy. But you are at war with something deeper than what’s on the surface.
The Moment It All “Changes”
It usually starts mid-conversation.
“You never really loved me.”
“You don’t want this.”
“We were always wrong from the beginning.”
Suddenly, the argument isn’t about the dishes or the tone or the silence. It’s about everything, past, present, and future. One person becomes both narrator and judge, and the other is left wondering, “Where did all this come from?”
What’s happening isn’t just miscommunication. It’s emotional distortion. When pain gets too loud, it starts speaking for everything. And if we don’t recognize it, we’ll believe it. Even when it’s not true.
When Pain Becomes the Narrator
This is one of the most dangerous patterns in any relationship:
When one person’s internal pain begins rewriting history through the lens of emotional overwhelm.
They’re not remembering the good. They’re not even seeing the current moment for what it is. Instead, they’re letting every old wound rise up and tell them what’s “really” happening.
They aren’t lying intentionally. They’re just being led by pain that was never healed. It’s not their spirit speaking, it’s their storm.
“Be sober, be vigilant…”
1 Peter 5:8
The Identity Theft That Happens in Emotional Conflict
In these moments, there’s a terrifying shift that occurs:
One person begins speaking for the other.
“You don’t care.”
“You were never honest.”
“You never wanted this.”
This is more than just misunderstanding. It’s a spiritual hijacking of identity. And while it may feel like “clarity” to the person in pain, it’s actually a narrative driven by fear, not truth.
But love doesn’t do that.
“Love believes all things…”
1 Corinthians 13:7
Love may be disappointed. It may be hurt. But it doesn’t twist the past to match the pain of the present. That’s not love, that’s emotional infection.
What the Other Person Might Be Trying to Say (But Can’t Get Through)
For the one on the receiving end of this wave, it’s disorienting. They may be calm, soft-spoken, or even pleading:
“That’s not how I see it…”
“That’s not what I meant…”
“I love you, even when I don’t bring up the past.”
But those words often can’t reach the person drowning in pain. When our emotions are overflowing, love can sound like denial. And grace can feel like silence. But sometimes, silence is strength. And refusing to rehearse the past is actually a choice to protect the present.
When Refusing to Rehash Is a Sign of Spiritual Maturity
There’s a wisdom that many overlook:
Some people don’t bring up the past, not because they’re in denial,
but because they’ve truly forgiven it.
To them, forgiveness isn’t about pretending nothing happened. It’s about refusing to keep the pain alive.
They don’t need to revisit the old arguments. They don’t need to tally up emotional debts. They’ve chosen peace over punishment.
“Love keeps no record of wrongs…”
1 Corinthians 13:5
A Lifeline: The Golden Glass Bridge
There’s a tool I’ve come to see as spiritual gold during emotional storms. I call it the Golden Glass Bridge.
It’s the practice of pausing and asking:
“If this version of the story was born during pain,
could it be pain talking and not truth?”
That question creates space.
It lets light in.
It becomes the bridge between how we feel and what’s really happening.
It helps us see clearly through the storm, not just with it.
For the One Overwhelmed by Emotion
If you’re the one who sometimes spirals, if your hurt suddenly starts narrating everything, I want you to know this:
You are not your pain.
But you’ve been trying to carry something that was too heavy. And that weight started speaking for you.
Let Jesus speak instead. Let healing speak. Let the Spirit show you which feelings are echoes of old battles and which ones are truly about today.
“Be transformed by the renewing of your mind…”
Romans 12:2
For the One Holding Steady
And if you’re the one staying calm, holding steady, choosing to love even when you’re misunderstood…
Stay rooted.
You’re not weak for refusing to engage the way pain wants you to.
You’re not dismissive for choosing peace.
Sometimes spiritual strength looks like refusing to let pain take the mic.
You’re not avoiding truth, you’re protecting it.
“The servant of the Lord must not strive; but be gentle unto all…”
2 Timothy 2:24
In love, perception can shift fast. Old emotions rise like shadows and whisper stories that were never true. But that doesn’t have to be the end.
Love, real, Spirit-led love, can outlast the storm.
And when we learn how to see through the moment instead of reacting to it, we don’t just save the relationship. We save the hearts inside it.
“How do I get rid of jealousy?”
When someone asked me that, they didn’t realize they were asking how to kick out a spirit one that had gotten comfortable feeding off their soul.
What I’ve learned through experience is this:
Jealousy isn’t just a feeling. It’s spiritual oppression. And you don’t overcome it by just resisting it you overcome it by replacing it.
Celebrate others until it becomes real.
Love on purpose.
And watch what happens.
Your soul isn’t just surviving this life. It’s growing in it.
Jealousy starves the soul. But love? Love feeds it.
You’re not just getting free.
You’re becoming someone darkness doesn’t want to mess with.
Someone who knows how it works and how to shut it down.
My answer, from lived experience, this is part of my testimony.
Someone asked me, “How do I get rid of jealousy?”
And what they didn’t realize is that they were asking how to kick out a spirit. And not just any spirit, but one that had gotten comfortable feeding off their soul.
So I told them what I’ve learned through experience. Because this isn’t a theory. It’s something I walked through myself. And once I saw it for what it was, everything changed.
Step One: Celebrate Others Until It Becomes Real
Make it a daily thing, even a constant thing to celebrate others. Celebrate their wins. Celebrate their presence. Celebrate who they are. Even if it feels awkward at first.
Go out of your way to help someone feel special. Help them plan. Contribute to what they’re doing. Find ways to be part of their joy. Do it until the thoughts in your own head start shifting. Until you can see what’s good about them without having to convince yourself.
That’s the goal: to see it without effort. When your mind naturally forms the thought, “They are actually special,” you’re starting to win. That moment is where healing begins. Keep showing up until that moment becomes your new normal.
You don’t lose anything by doing this. You only gain. And whether it takes days or months depends on you, on how much it means to you to be free.
What Jealousy Really Is
Jealousy isn’t just a feeling. It’s spiritual oppression. You’ll know that the moment you’re free. The moment it lifts off you, you’ll feel the difference and you won’t be able to unsee it.
And what you’ll realize is that you weren’t just dealing with it. You were agreeing with it.
You were setting out the welcome mat. You were inviting it in by the way you thought, felt, and acted.
Every time you acted out of jealousy through silence, sarcasm, resentment, self-pity, you were ringing a bell. And that bell echoes in the spirit realm. It’s something spirits hear through your emotional agreement. That bell says, “Come on in.”
They come. They feed. They stay.
The Book of Enoch talks about this. These spirits roam the earth looking for a place to rest. But they don’t have bodies, so they can’t experience the world, unless we give them access. And the way we do that is through our emotions, reactions, and behavior. We become the door.
After you take away their ability to experience the world through you, they lose interest. They leave.
But Leaving Isn’t Enough
It’s not just about kicking them out. You have to replace what they were occupying.
That part of you can’t just be “emptied”, it has to be converted. If not, they’ll be back. And they don’t come alone next time.
That’s why I say: don’t just try to fight jealousy. Decide to be against it forever. Train yourself to do the opposite of what jealousy wants. Keep doing the opposite until something changes in you. And it will. At some point, you’ll stop “trying” and you’ll actually hate it. That’s a good thing.
Stay focused on who you’re loving. Because someone needs what you’re doing. And soon, you’ll realize that you needed it too.
The Soul Is Like a Baby Growing in the Womb of Your Life
Jealousy starves the soul. So does greed. So does lust. So does fear. So does deceit. So does shame. All of it cuts off nourishment.
Love is what feeds the soul. Acts of real love, care, service, celebration, these are nutrients. Our souls grow from those things. And here’s how I’ve come to see it:
Our soul is like a baby inside the life of our body. This life we live, it’s the womb. And the way we live, our choices, emotions, actions, that’s what feeds the soul while it grows.
And when I say that, I mean it. It’s not just a metaphor. I believe some souls don’t make it. Because they never got fed. Or they got fed poison. Or they were so wrapped up in spiritual oppression for so long that they never developed into what they were supposed to be.
That’s why I say it’s not a small thing to live with jealousy or envy or any spirit like it.
It steals from your life. It drains your soul. It might even corrupt or destroy it.
And it takes away from your quality of life now and possibly from your eternal one too.
But love changes that.
If you have even the smallest ability to offer real care to someone then do it. Not to feel good about yourself. But because souls depend on it. Yours and theirs.
You won’t just get free from jealousy.
You’ll become someone that spirit won’t want to mess with anymore.
Because you’ll know how it works and how to shut it down.
That’s someone who’s not just healed.
That’s someone who’s dangerous to darkness.
Someone asked me, “How do I get rid of jealousy?”
What they didn’t realize is that they were asking how to evict a spirit one that had made itself at home, feeding off their soul for years.
I didn’t answer with theory. I answered with testimony. Because I’ve walked through it.
Jealousy didn’t leave when I prayed once. It left when I started celebrating others in ways that made my flesh uncomfortable until something in me changed.
This is how healing began:
By choosing joy for others until it became joy in me.
Not every argument begins with you.
But it can still find its way to you.
Sometimes your spouse is angry at someone else, a betrayal, a loss, a buildup of pressure and even though you didn’t cause it, if you’re not careful, you’ll be cast in the role of the one who did.
And if you misstep, try to fix it too quickly, deflect, or explain something too soon, you become the enemy in a moment that had nothing to do with you.
What It Looks Like
You walk in on a storm you didn’t cause.
They’re pacing, distant, snapping or withdrawing.
You offer logic. They say, “You’re not even hearing me.”
You try to calm things down.
They go quiet, but not in peace.
You say, “I didn’t do anything.”
They say, “Exactly.”
Now you’re no longer the bystander.
You’re part of the problem.
But here’s the truth:
They’re not trying to punish you.
They’re trying to survive an emotion that has taken over their internal world and in that state, everything is filtered through that one emotional voice.
Why It Happens
Emotion doesn’t respond to strategy.
It responds to recognition, but not just any recognition.
It responds to what that emotion has been exposed to and practiced in a person’s life.
So when a person is overwhelmed, they’re no longer responding as their full self.
They’re responding as the version of them shaped entirely by the life experience of that specific emotion.
It’s like the entirety of their existence is momentarily being lived from within that one emotion, its memories, its reactions, its learned defenses.
That’s why it’s not enough to know someone’s heart, you have to understand how their emotional history shapes their behavior when that emotion takes the lead.
When You’ve Already Been Pulled Into the Storm
If you’ve already been labeled as part of the problem. If they’ve come at you with blame or silence. If you’ve become the placeholder for another person’s failure. Then this is not your moment to argue. It’s your moment to wait.
And when they come back, because they will, don’t look for a traditional apology.
Sometimes, the fact that they return to you is the apology.
It might sound like frustration, like a lecture.
Like a one sided stream of instructions or future plans or emotional download.
But if you listen without judgment, without defense, without needing to be declared “right”, because you know you were targeted by overreaction and not something you did. You’ll hear something holy.
You’ll hear through revelation what the relationship needs.
You’ll hear what has never been built before: the framework for how to love each other in emotional environments that neither of you were taught to navigate.
The words may not feel fair. They may not even be accurate. But they are instructional.
They are the blueprint of how safety wants to be built, spoken through the pain that’s trying to find a way to be understood. That’s what those long winded lectures are.
You Can’t Just Build Understanding in Peace
Most people wait for quiet moments to talk.
But emotional unity isn’t built only in quiet.
It’s built across all emotional environments.
When peace is present, you train understanding into peace.
When frustration is present, you train curiosity into frustration.
When grief is present, you train comfort into grief.
Because every emotion becomes more intelligent based on what it’s been exposed to. And later, when those emotions take over again, they’ll reach for what they remember.
If you’ve practiced understanding together across many inner environments,
then in future storms that understanding becomes visible.
It becomes a bridge the emotion can use to return home.
A Vision I Was Shown
I was shown something in a dream.
I was lifted up and set down upon a bridge made of golden glass. And as I looked around, I saw groups of people walking together in formation. Some walked in pairs, others alone but all carried letters that hovered above their lifted arms and all the letters and words connected and worked together in making the same general message that I knew but not from reading, it was a feeling and it was why they belonged there and what was allowing them to walk across the bridge.
Then something felt off.
I looked around and wondered who it was that was missing. So I walked to the edge of the bridge and looked down and saw every person on earth as a dark figure and felt their noise of chaos between each other.
Then a giant came beside me. He had the head of a bull and placed his hand on my shoulder and walked me back with the others.
And he said only this:
“Don’t cry for them. They made their choice.”
I didn’t understand at the time.
But over the years, the Lord has helped me see.
This bridge, the golden glass path suspended over chaos, is something that exists because of choice.
Because of exposure, obedience, and the decision to carry truth, even when we don’t yet fully understand it.
Each emotional environment we live through: peace, grief, joy, frustration gets trained by what we expose it to.
And when a storm rises up within us, our emotions pull from what they’ve practiced.
But when we’ve practiced understanding, when we’ve chosen love, truth, humility, then even in our most overwhelming moments, a bridge remains. A way back and way through.
Some never choose to build that path and for those who do the bridge isn’t just a metaphor.
It’s a real spiritual infrastructure, gifted from above, formed by practice, vision, and the presence of God.
I’ve come to understand that the bridge I saw is what I now call “The Golden Glass Bridge.”
It’s a bridge made for reconciliation.
For the healing of relationships.
For the soul’s return from inner isolation.
For walking together through the weight of this life without losing one another in the storm.
It’s there for those who choose to walk it.
Anger doesn’t always come from the moment you’re in.
Sometimes it’s borrowed from a wound…
A betrayal. A disrespect. A disappointment that never got voiced.
But once it shows up, it colors everything.
Even love.
Even silence.
Even kindness.
That’s why connection breaks down it’s not because you stopped loving each other.
It’s because pain started speaking louder than presence.
Spiritual leadership isn’t fixing it.
It’s noticing the shift.
Slowing down.
Making space for the person inside the anger.
Because it’s not you vs. them.
It’s both of you vs. the storm that tried to sneak in.
Sometimes the anger isn’t about you.
Sometimes… it’s not even about them.
They’re just in anger.
Maybe something happened earlier, someone borrowed money and didn’t pay it back. A betrayal. A moment at work that felt unfair. A feeling of disrespect that never got a chance to breathe.
Whatever the cause, in that moment… the anger becomes the whole environment.
And here’s what matters
That emotion filters everything.
Even a kind word.
Even silence.
Even love.
It all passes through the storm.
They’re not trying to be unfair.
They’re not attacking you.
They may not even realize how loud the anger is speaking inside of them.
But in that space, your voice might feel like interruption.
Your presence might feel like pressure.
Your care might feel like conflict.
And if neither of you are aware of what’s happening, the pain will decide:
You must not understand me.
And just like that, a wall goes up.
Not because they want to shut you out…
but because they’re trying to survive something bigger than the moment.
That’s where spiritual leadership steps in.
Not control.
Not correction.
But leadership in the form of stillness.
In the form of discernment.
Leadership notices the shift.
Leadership slows down.
It doesn’t try to fix the anger, it makes space for the person inside it.
You don’t have to agree with the reason.
You don’t have to solve the situation.
But you can protect the connection by not pretending nothing’s wrong.
Because it’s not you vs. them.
It’s both of you vs. the storm that tried to sneak in.
And if you’re the one in pain this matters too
You’re not wrong for feeling.
You’re not broken.
You’re human.
But remember
The body doesn’t always know what to do with pain.
So it grabs anger.
And tries to speak for you.
Don’t let it put words in your spirit’s mouth.
Don’t let it turn someone who loves you into a stranger.
They may not be perfect.
But sometimes… they’re not the enemy.
They’re just standing too close to the wound.
Most people think their thoughts are coming from their mind…
But what if some of them are just your body reacting on autopilot?
The body remembers pain. It craves comfort.
It avoids discomfort like it’s death.
But discomfort isn’t death.
It’s the beginning of real life.
Scripture says, “The carnal mind is enmity against God.”
That’s not just a verse.
That’s a warning:
If the body leads, the spirit goes silent.
You are not your urges.
You are not your panic.
You are not your flesh.
You are spirit.
And the moment you remember that the healing begins.
Most of us don’t realize that the body has a mind of its own. Not the kind that makes plans or dreams big things but the kind that reacts on autopilot. It remembers pain and craves comfort. It avoids discomfort like it’s death. And that’s a problem, because discomfort isn’t death. It’s the beginning of real life.
Scripture says “the carnal mind is enmity against God” (Romans 8:7). That carnal mind, what we often mistake as our own thoughts is the body’s voice trying to stay in control. And when the body leads, the spirit follows in silence.
But you are not your body.
The real “you” is spirit. “That which is born of the flesh is flesh; and that which is born of the Spirit is spirit.” (John 3:6). If your life is led by the body’s voice, its fears, its impulses, needs, then the true you, the spirit lives hidden, forgotten, and in darkness. Not because you’re evil. But because the part of you that was made to lead is being smothered under the one that was only made to serve.
And here’s the thing, when people sin, it’s not because they’re wicked at the core, it’s because they’re listening to the wrong leader. The flesh can be noisy. It can be confused for your voice. It can feel like truth. But it’s only reacting to stimuli. That’s why it gets confused by temptation and thinks it’s desire. That’s why it panics at discomfort and as if it’s death. That’s why it runs from the Holy Spirit because it’s terrified of what it can’t control.
But you were never made to be controlled by your impulses.
Even science now confirms what Scripture has always hinted: the mind is not confined to the brain. In quantum biology and neuroscience, researchers like Dr. Karl Pribram and physicist David Bohm proposed models showing that the brain acts more like a receiver than a container. The “holographic brain” theory suggests our thoughts are influenced by fields beyond us. Others like Rupert Sheldrake have explored morphic resonance, explaining how people, even strangers, can sense when they’re being watched or share emotional states across distance. It’s not fantasy it’s how we’re designed.
Ever walked into a crowded room and instantly felt eyes on you then turned and locked eyes with someone you never saw before? That’s not coincidence. That’s resonance. Ever thought of someone, and they called seconds later? That’s not magic. That’s how spirit works. You’re connected.
So when someone struggles with thoughts they can’t explain like impure desires, intrusive temptations, emotional surges, it’s not proof of who they are. It’s proof that their body’s radar is picking up things they were never meant to entertain. The body amplifies those signals. But the spirit has the right to refuse them.
“Walk in the Spirit, and you shall not fulfill the lust of the flesh.” (Galatians 5:16)
This is where healing begins, when you realize that the flesh remembers what comforted it, even if it was toxic… but the Spirit rewrites what the flesh rehearsed. That’s the war over the mind. And it’s a war you don’t win by fighting harder. You win by remembering who you are.
The content explores the nature of thoughts, questioning their origins and emphasizing that not all are inherently ours. It highlights the interplay between spiritual awareness and emotional reactions, suggesting that thoughts can stem from various influences, including the environment and spiritual sources. The author advocates for recognizing and challenging intrusive thoughts, promoting awareness over condemnation. This series aims to empower individuals to reclaim mental clarity and emotional freedom by understanding the spiritual dynamics behind their thoughts and feelings.
A Spirit Led Exploration of the Mind
“We take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.” 2 Corinthians 10:5
Are All Thoughts Truly Ours?
Have you ever stopped mid thought and asked yourself:
“Why am I thinking this?”
Not just what the thought is about… but where it’s coming from?
Why does a wave of emotion hit you in a moment when nothing provoked it when anger or desire, sadness or fear, suddenly rise up inside?
Maybe you’ve caught yourself imagining something you don’t actually want. Or perhaps you’ve been caught off guard by feelings of lust, rage, jealousy, depression, or anxiety. And if you’ve ever wondered,
“Where did this come from? Why am I feeling this way right now?”
Then you’re not alone.
Could it be that not all thoughts are truly ours?
What if the body reacting to physical stress, memory, or hormonal shifts produces a feeling that the mind then translates into thought?
What if your spirit senses something invisible… and your mind gives that impression shape?
What if you’re perceiving something in the spiritual atmosphere around you or even sensing a presence that’s not of you at all?
This isn’t just psychology. It’s spiritual.
And it’s scriptural.
A Kingdom Lens on the Mind
Most of us were never taught to watch our thoughts.
We were taught how to perform, how to act, how to react but not how to discern the spiritual patterns behind those reactions.
And yet Scripture says,
“Be transformed by the renewing of your mind…” Romans 12:2
Before that transformation comes, the mind often feels like chaos.
But once the mind is understood as territory spiritual ground that can be ruled by either flesh or Spirit we begin to see that even overwhelming emotions like lust, anger, fear, or despair can be placed under God’s government.
Emotions Under Authority
Every feeling whether pleasant or painful carries with it a kind of power.
But not all power is truth. And not all emotion is the voice of your spirit.
The more I begin to recognize that thoughts and feelings can originate from the body, from old patterns, from the atmosphere, or even from spiritual sources not aligned with God, the more freedom I begin to walk in.
Instead of condemning myself for the thoughts I didn’t want…
I began noticing the moments they arrived.
And as I noticed without judging I started seeing what they were responding to.
Some thoughts come from the environment.
Some are reactions to sounds, smells, facial expressions, memories.
Some are even the mind’s interpretation of what the body is feeling in the moment.
And some are spiritual impressions the spirit picks up that the mind then forms into thoughts or emotions.
And even that… is not always you.
Noticing the Introductions
Once I began recognizing these weren’t always my thoughts, something changed:
I started catching them at the introduction.
Instead of fighting intrusive thoughts after they settled in, I could now feel them knocking before they even got through the door.
And this awareness didn’t just help me personally it allowed me to work in my own family, in my own household, to cut off the settling in of thoughts that would later grow into emotional confusion or spiritual heaviness.
This doesn’t mean ignoring emotions.
It means observing them and asking:
Is this from the Spirit of God? Is this a product of agreement? Or is this something foreign that I’ve allowed in without realizing it?
Good and Bad Agreements
Agreements aren’t always bad.
There are good ones those aligned with peace, with forgiveness, with love, with the will of God.
And then there are ones that aren’t.
The ones that feel right in the moment because of emotion or memory or reaction.
But later, they don’t produce life. They produce bitterness, shame, confusion, or chaos.
Every agreement we make whether we know we’re making it or not opens a space in us.
And each agreement, if it goes unchallenged, increases our capacity to carry that same kind of energy again.
It builds and charges like electricity in a room with no ground wire looking for somewhere to strike.
It’s like a lake behind a dam.
Every moment we agree actively or passively with something that doesn’t belong, it’s like adding more water.
A lyric you don’t challenge, a memory you keep replaying, a feeling you choose not to resist it all goes in.
At first, it doesn’t feel like anything’s wrong.
But over time, the weight builds. The water level rises. And if nothing is drained, if no renewal happens, then that dam your emotional boundary, your internal peace can’t hold forever.
And when it breaks, it shows up in what people call “snapping,” “giving in,” or “losing control.”
But I want to say this clearly:
You do not have to snap. You do not have to give in. Giving in is not inevitable.
This is being written so that you can become aware so that even when the emotion feels strong, you’ll recognize what’s behind it before it ever gets that far.
Because sin doesn’t happen in a vacuum.
“Each person is tempted when they are dragged away by their own desire and enticed. Then desire, when it has conceived, gives birth to sin.” James 1:14–15
So desire has a process.
And the earlier you recognize it the earlier you can resist agreement with it the less power it holds.
If you’ve ever felt like you were on the edge, about to act out of character or do something you’d regret
That edge wasn’t sudden.
It was built by moments of agreement along the way.
And I say this as a warning, but also as a word of hope:
If you’ve ever believed there has to be more than what this world offers if you’ve felt deep down that this world isn’t quite right
Then I believe you are one of those who doesn’t have to suffer through these unholy experiences.
These thoughts aren’t small things.
They’re not insignificant.
Because Scripture calls us to bring even our thoughts our minds, our bodies into submission to the will of the Spirit.
What This Series Will Explore
This isn’t just about mental health.
It’s about spiritual clarity, and knowing what it means to be truly free in your mind, your feelings, and your will.
This series is written for those who want change but don’t know where to start.
It’s for those who’ve been battling thoughts they never asked for.
It’s for the one who wants to walk in peace and power but first must learn how to take the ground of their own mind.
And if that’s you…
Then you’re not alone.
And you’re not powerless.
You are being equipped.
In the next essay, we’ll begin to unpack how the physiology of the body nervous system, memory, hormones, and physical triggers can be part of the spiritual battle, and how we are meant to become governors of our own mind, rather than be governed by our past or programming.
We’ll also look deeper at how even in Scripture, these things were hinted at.
Nebuchadnezzar had trumpets and harps that triggered people to bow…
That wasn’t just performance. That was mass programming.
We’ll begin to see how these metaphysical themes are present even in ancient texts and how they help explain what many are feeling today.
Most people think spiritual warfare is about demons. But the real battle?
It’s the war for your mind.
Not just what you think but how you think.
Before you ever opened a Bible, the world was already teaching you how to interpret it. The sermons, the culture, even the label “Christian” came with scripts. But Jesus didn’t die to give you a script. He came to give you life.
This isn’t just about sin management. This is about soul transformation. The mind is more than the brain it’s the interface between the spirit and this world. And it’s either surrendered to Truth… or programmed by deception.
If you’ve ever felt like there’s more than what you were taught not just more information, but a deeper kind of walk this was written for you.
We’ve all heard sermons, read verses, argued doctrine, and carried labels Christian, saved, sinner, evangelical. But beneath the surface of our confessions and identities, there is a deeper war. A war that isn’t just against flesh and blood, or even demons and principalities it’s a war against everything we’ve been taught by the world that now tries to coexist with the Word of God.
Spiritual warfare isn’t abstract it’s intimate. It’s the painful unveiling of who you thought you were, and who God actually calls you to be.
The gospel crucifies the comfort of the old man and grants us comfort through the Comforter, the Spirit of Truth.
The Mind: The Battlefield of Heaven and Earth
The real war isn’t in the clouds. It’s not political. It’s not merely doctrinal. It’s in the mind and not just the brain. It’s the entire interface through which the soul interprets reality, chooses belief, receives identity, and surrenders to truth or deception.
The Bible doesn’t treat the mind as simply thought processing tissue in the skull. The mind, in Scripture, is the seat of intent, the gateway of spiritual access, and the steward of obedience.
“Be transformed by the renewing of your mind…” Romans 12:2
“We take every thought captive to obey Christ.” 2 Corinthians 10:5
This isn’t behavior tweaking. It’s soul architecture.
What Is the Mind According to Scripture?
In both Hebrew and Greek thought, the “mind” is not separated from the heart or spirit. It is a spiritual command center.
“As a man thinks in his heart, so is he.” Proverbs 23:7
“Be renewed in the spirit of your minds.” Ephesians 4:23
“Love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength.” Mark 12:30
This is not just emotional sentiment or logic its spiritual interface. The mind is the tool of discernment, agreement, and surrender.
Metaphysical Christian View: The Mind as Interface
In the beginning of my journey, I wanted more than what was being presented in church services and conversations. I longed to walk with God in a way that felt real and holy not merely accepted.
As I searched, I came across the concept of spiritual warfare, and from there discovered writings by Christian authors who took a more metaphysical tone interpreting Scripture through a lens of inner transformation, spiritual perception, and layered meaning. Their voices helped fill in the gaps for me gaps I hadn’t even realized existed, especially around sin and holiness.
What I saw in those writings matched what I felt in prayer: that freedom from sin isn’t merely a goal, it’s a promise. That Jesus meant what He said when He called us to be perfect as our Father is perfect. And that there were indeed others who believed this, lived it, or at least desired to without compromise.
This section is here for those who, like I once was, are searching for the missing pieces and who know deep down that the call of Jesus is to transformation, not tolerance.
The Mind Beyond the Brain
I’ve long had an interest in neuroscience. As I’ve studied how the mind functions physically and spiritually, I’ve found deep resonance with what God was already teaching me through Scripture.
Christian scientists such as Dr. Caroline Leaf write:
“The mind is energy, and it changes matter. Spirit controls mind. Mind controls body.”
This affirms that the mind is not limited to the physical brain. It exists as a spatial-spiritual interface where the soul interacts with memory, experience, emotion, and truth.
The mind, in spiritual warfare, is not just where you think but where you either submit to truth or construct alternate realities. It is not neutral. And it is not just intellectual. It is a battlefield.
You Were Programmed to Misunderstand God
Here’s a sobering truth: most of us were taught how to read the Bible before we ever read it. The sermons, denominations, cultures, and mentors that shaped us also gave us a lens and sometimes that lens filters out what God is actually saying.
This is what I mean by “the programming of the modern believer.” It’s not about deception on purpose. It’s about assumptions carried over from a culture that does not submit to the Spirit.
“Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind…” Romans 12:2
Many of us were taught grace as tolerance rather than as empowerment. Many were taught sin was unavoidable rather than removable. But God’s kingdom is different it doesn’t just teach us. It unteaches us first.
God’s Kingdom Untaches Before It Teaches
Jesus didn’t come to just add onto your current way of life. He came to undo it.
God’s light reveals what true light is. And in doing so, it reveals what darkness is even if we used to call that darkness good. This is why so many resist truth: it unmasks what we once treasured, even called “godly,” and shows it for what it really is.
“The entrance of your words gives light; it gives understanding to the simple.” Psalm 119:130
“Woe to those who call evil good and good evil, who put darkness for light and light for darkness…” Isaiah 5:20
The Spirit of Truth is given to those who obey (Acts 5:32). And when He enters, He not only comforts you He confronts what you thought was already right.
Truth Isn’t Hidden, But It’s Still Missed
Some argue that truth is plain, and it is but plain doesn’t mean automatic.
Jesus said:
“To you it has been given to know the secrets of the kingdom of God, but for others they are in parables…” Luke 8:10
It’s not about intelligence. It’s about posture.
“The natural man does not accept the things of the Spirit… they are spiritually discerned.” 1 Corinthians 2:14
Truth doesn’t come to those who want to argue it. It comes to those who want to surrender to it.
The Illusion of Arrival: When Identity Replaces Transformation
There’s a trap in spiritual life: mistaking labels for transformation.
Imagine someone receiving a white coat at medical school orientation and calling themselves “doctor” forever but never studying, training, or practicing. The same happens spiritually. We say “I’m saved,” and stop there.
But Jesus says:
“Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven… but the one who does the will of my Father.” Matthew 7:21
Paul writes:
“Put on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make no provision for the flesh.” Romans 13:14
You were not saved just to be labeled. You were saved to be remade.
Sin Is Not a Life Sentence
Let’s be clear. This isn’t about legalism. It’s about promise.
“No one born of God makes a practice of sinning… because God’s seed abides in him.” 1 John 3:9
Victory over sin isn’t earned. It’s received.
“Victory is not gained by struggling, but by surrender.” Watchman Nee
If sin still rules your life, the war is still being fought in the mind. But freedom is closer than you think.
This isn’t a rejection of terms like “Christian” or “saved.” It’s a rejection of the idea that words alone define truth.
Jesus didn’t die to give you a label He died to give you life.
“The word of God is living… discerning the thoughts and intentions of the heart.” Hebrews 4:12
“You will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” John 8:32
Spiritual warfare isn’t about memorizing defense. It’s about walking in truth truth that unmakes the lies you were taught, and remakes you into someone who walks in light.
You were made for this war.
I wrote this for anyone who’s ever felt that tug that sense that there’s more than what you’ve seen, more than what’s usually taught. Not just more knowledge, but a different kind of walk. This isn’t coming from a place of having arrived, but from wanting to go all in beyond the seeker stage, and outside of institutional faith toward the kind of relationship with God you’ve always known deep down was meant for you, even if you’ve never seen anyone live it out around you. If that sounds familiar, then maybe this was written for you.
I had this dream of walking through peoples houses and their yards. The houses abs yards were on display as museums. I got there by grabbing on and not letting go of the tusks of a mammoth 🦣, it bucked and dragged me down and as I went down with it everything disolved and faded into a different world. The same place but things were different. When I came to in the world I was grabbing on the tusks still but the tusks were in the ground and faded like fossils. I tried standing up without letting go but when I did the mammoth started to resurrect and I felt something tell me, no let go not that yet. So I stood up and looked around and I was the only one there but I heard all the voices of people passing by as if echos of a tour of the museum. As I looked around and saw the mounds of dirt with fossils surfaced other ones would appear along with the voices and I heard the background voices of some who didn’t care and of another group who felt bad for them because they’re the reason we were all there. They needed to know and didn’t understand that this battle wasn’t in the past because the museum became richer by the present. Then an old man showed up who was part of the battle, then older men showed up who each had their own house/museum where they stayed and all we’re getting ready for when the bones come back out of the ground again. One was training me, he’d move around the house being always busy and I’d explore it. It was a simple house but it seemed endlessly huge inside and out the more I explored it. At a glance it seemed like a small house with a small yard around it, at closer inspection everything expanded infinity. While I was in the backyard Inspecting fossils again I put stakes in some fossils because while staring at them I saw the event but it was just ground. The old man showed up working on a fence and answering all my questions. His daughter showed up, he gave her to me years before but I didn’t know of her or our history of experience together until she showed up. A partly visible crowd behind her was waiting on me. Outsiders started to pass through one or two at a time, seeing me and moving on…..
Remembering the rest, I just remembered another portion. Near the end I was given a carved, heavily detailed wooden ring with gold lace accents around it.
